Priyanka (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
Loneliness and depression

After realizing that I was more than likely mildly depressed and not being an advocate of prescription meds, I started doing some research. I had already searching for a good Neuro Psychologist and not a Psychiatrist as I did not want to start taking any medication.
Considering that for my whole life I have been super active, very productive and motivation had never been an issue, I recognized that there was a problem, Nothing seem to matter, and nothing in life made a difference, and I would sit on my desk just looking at my computer, or I would come home and it would be constantly irritation and fights. Initially I blamed it on growing older (I'm 44) but when I got really honest with myself, I knew it was more than that. Within a span of 3 months from the time I started looking to come to a good psychologist, I found Prof Singh, but the sad part is that by now the misunderstanding between my husband and me, had reached such a level that, he was doing his best to avoid me, and I have to admit that maybe I had become overzealous with increasing age.
Psychology is so different from psychiatricy, and I must advise all those people who are looking to improve themselves and their personality, automotive depression, or day-to-day dealings, which are making life miserable, you must come to a psychologist only if you are prepared to go through the counselling / psychotherapy sessions. There is no miracle in the first sitting but you will come to know in the very first sitting, whether, the doctor is the correct one for you or not.
For me, I want to say that Prof Singh was not only the correct choice, but also in the very first meeting, when I went away, I had this feeling that I am in good hands, and that I will be able to come out of my depression in a positive way without any medicines.
So far, so good. It has been about 8 weeks and I have noticed marked improvements in my overall outlook, mood and perspective. I really am starting to feel like my old self. My desire to be active, to do the normal parts of life like household chores, maintenance, grocery shopping, exercising - which I had become to dread and be too tired for, are all back to just being activities of daily life and I happily do them. I am motivated to pursue my hobbies again. I wake up feeling fresh and ready to start the day. At this point, I am in conversation to see if I can come to him regularly, because I am now a firm believer of the fact that, for too long I have been trying to solve my problems myself, and within the family, but that is not the correct way, and that is not the way, we should treat our mental health, and after three months, the difference that I see in myself, is significant enough to say that, I made the correct choice, and I want to thank you doctor, for being there, and helping me through all the confusion that I had in my mind, as well as all the negativity I had accumulated, and I would gladly recommend just anybody any day.

Mr Luthra (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
Marriage Relationship

I am sitting with my wife as she is writing about her experience with weight gain and depression, and I also want to write because I want to share, what I went through in the last eight years of our marriage. when my wife and I got married, we were to people who loved each other deeply, although we could not have been more different from each other. However over a period of time, the pressure of my job, and living in a joint family system, I think had taken a toll on her mental state, and after our second child, I found that she was getting heavier and heavier, more irritable, and will easily snap at me when I would come home, not realising that I was very much by her side, only if she would tell me what to do, because I actually did not know how to help her. As I reflect today, although not very sure in the beginning, I must say that I owe a large part of the happiness we are experiencing now, to Dr Singh, and I was very reluctant but I am happy that my wife dragged me inside to meet him and to also open up and state my case of our marital unhappiness. What I thought would be a serious advisory session turned out to be a insightful masterful relationship Dr who was sensitive to my inability to open up, but earnest and awkward efforts to want my wife and family to be happy. My wife is completely right, and I think that had we not gone into therapy together, I doubt that this marriage would have held on longer together, because even I was getting extremely tired of working throughout the day, and coming home to listen to her nagging me, and my mother complaining about all the things that are not yet done in the house. These sessions have taught me how to use our differences to enhance our life’s experiences, and when I now look at it, I remember that when I was on site in the United States, I would always wonder why people would go to their therapist, and I now realise its value. Being together takes a lot of effort, and sometimes you cannot do it alone, and sitting with Dr Singh has enhanced our marriage by helping me understand ‘Chutki’ much better, because we have been able to identify the triggers that were causing the problem in our marriage.
Dr Singh has kept all the sessions as practical as he could and there is no doubt we have seen the passion, trust and connection blossom! As a husband I feel I'm a better individual and partner, and what has helped the most is the decrease in the everyday fighting. First I took the ‘fighting rules’ as a joke, but now I realise that it is better to trust a doctor rather than think that it is a waste of time. I want to also thank Dr Singh as in a way we have found a mentor and a life coach with whom we can be ourself. I hope that he can help many more the way he helped us.

Mrs Luthra (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
Weight gain and depression

I clearly recall going to a shop in the Mall where Dr. Singhs Centre is located and taking a walk as my husband ordered all the non veg for the get together in our house last holi. I was just tired and could not stand in one place and the only thought in my mind was that I have to now spend another 2 days making food for so many family members. I was wandering eating my chocolate when I stopped in and walked in his clinic where this - tall guy with clipped hair – as I remember him was sitting on the carpet engaging an Autistic Child. The first thing I heard was “please go outside if you want to eat chocolates in front of children”
I was so taken aback and angry that I left and when I now look back in retrospect I can see that I was quite depressed. A lifetime of yoyo dieting had left me at 80 Kg and still climbing. The more extreme the weight loss, the more rapid and extreme the consequent weight gains. The last diet I had undertaken, I do not even want to remember as I lost weight but I was unwell with symptoms, which included seizures. I put on 10Kg stone in 4 months which I hadn't even realized was possible. I really did not know where to turn. That is when I decided to swallow my pride and go back to the same clinic and that decision then changed my life.
As an educated person, and yes with the clear thought that if I can spend so much on different diets, why cant I meet a good doctor and see what he has to offer, I kept my mind open and the circle of excellence has been useful.
When I look back still very hard to believe, but the first meeting itself was an experience in itself, because the doctor showed me a new way to be myself and how to view my own image without being ashamed of it. He actually wanted to finish the entire session in 2/3 sittings, but it is I who insisted on meeting him regularly on a weekly basis, and it is 12 months now, and I have been able to stop sabotaging my own self for the last eight months, and stopped turning to food to avoid confronting my fears. I remember that Dr Singh always encouraged me to eat, and that he said that if you don’t eat how are you going to get the fuel to go about your daily life, and although I knew about it, but I had never practised it, I actually sat down and allowed him to prepare a chart of daily living that showed how I can make it progress towards a healthy lifestyle. I actually learned what is visualisation, and the power of visualisation as taught me, how to discern the cravings from the needs. I had such a strong relationship with different types of foods, but gradually over a period of time, there are foods which I simply do not keep in the house anymore, I don’t feel obliged to have them for the benefit of others, and if there is someone like my daughter who insist's that she would like to eat something which I now realise is unhealthy, I ask her not to bring it unless it is an immediate priority and she’s not going to be able to live without it.
From where I was to where I am today, I am a much much happier person more creative and well balanced, as a individual I feel more resourceful and my priorities in life have changed significantly. I also realise that due to the weight gain, I was constantly in a state of sadness, which never occurred to me might be a form of depression, and I have been able to pull myself out of it with Dr Singh’s help. While Dr Singh wanted to go about it in a scientific way, I insisted that I would like to talk my way through it, and the first thing he asked me was if I was strong enough to sustain the regularity of coming, because it would create a lot of pressure on me from my family and my husband. But I have to give this credit to my husband that he supported me fully, and as I write my experience, he is sitting right next to me and wants to also write what he observed has changed about me over the last one year. One of the major things I have learnt being with Dr Singh is that I do not need to justify myself, and that I need to be more centred, and that I also need time and space just as much as any other person in my life. And because of this and the other changes, as well as the change in the mindset that I have been able to make, I am fitter than I have ever been in my adult life and my energy levels are more consistent than before. There is no more weight gain and weight loss just like a game of yo-yo, and the cycle of depression that constantly followed me everywhere has decreased by almost 80 to 90%. one of the biggest and the most unforeseen outcomes has been the changes it has brought in my children, for watching me have started to change the way they also eat, and this is something I am very proud of because I know that they will not have to suffer the day I suffered.
When, I look back, and think about that day when I walked into the doctor’s clinic, and found him sitting on a carpet connecting with the child who I gradually came to realise had dyslexia as well as autism, and the way he asked me to eat outside, I think it was a blessing in disguise, and today I have no regrets for that reprimand, because today I am what I used to always be, and what I always wanted to be, and I can now look at myself in a much more positive way. I do not try to solve my problems anymore with food, and both my husband and I, prefer to go and discuss with Dr Singh what needs to be done, when we are down and out and everything seems very confusing. It has been a wonderful experience meeting you’s sir, and we look forward to a long-term relationship with you for the times to come.

R K Sharma (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
Reached a point of Divorce

I am 42 years old and when I look back at life, I feel utterly sad that so much time has been wasted just trying to resolve constant conflicts in life. First It was the parents, then it was brothers and sisters and then my spouse. Both my sister and I, are twins, but I think when I am all alone, that due to the random chance that usually happens, which we call life, she came out better, and for good or bad, I had to bear the burden of struggling for everything in life.
My marriage was an arranged marriage because during schooling as well as college we came from a very conservative family, and the concept of being in a relationship was unimaginable. Additionally being two sisters was not easy on our father who was in a private job, and not very senior. Also somewhere it was always there at the back of the mind that we have to be very careful in whatever we do. Marriage was not a very pleasant affair, and although we use to speak for long hours before the actual ceremony took place, everything seemed to change after we were wedded. I had only heard of petty jealousies, that happen in households, on TV and we used to often laugh as sisters that, what is portrayed on television is something straight out of what should have been maybe 100 years ago.
But I was totally wrong. If I was to say that what happened after the wedding was like a rerun of a soap opera, I would not be wrong. Everything started with the control of the kitchen, and everything ended with a shouting match between my husband and me, and the catalyst being someone who I thought would be a mother to me. Four years of marriage, and every day of sarcastic remarks and taunting became a burden that was too heavy to bear, and when I started to cry sitting in my seat in the office in front of the customers, as I worked in retail outlet at a senior post, I realised that if I don’t help myself nobody will. Coming to Prof Singh was a decision that when I look back, something that I took as a leap of faith when searching for a professional who could handle my issues.
On the first meeting itself, I realised that Prof Singh is someone I could truly be myself with. There was a very high degree of emotional safety in sharing with him what was going on, as the bouts of anxiety and low self-esteem, were damaging me to such an extent that I was not able to perform at work and neither was able to do any housework correctly. One of the things that I would like to say is that, I never knew what therapy is, and I used to always think of it as counselling. But after going through proper psychotherapy I understood that there is a difference between casual talking, and a scientific approach to what we’re going through in terms of emotional turmoil. The entire process that I went through, allowed me to express myself in a safe and nurturing space, and it definitely helped me to get all the buried anguish out, and see my problems for what they really were. When I came to Prof Singh, the overriding problem that was driving me to the edge of madness was, that I was being told something by my mother-in-law, and something else by my husband, which essentially meant that whatever communication we had in the house, was being turned around in some way or the other, and when I look at it, I really wonder why, because it is unnecessary and only serves to degenerate the atmosphere of the family. And this is exactly what happened in our family also. After a period of time, the entire family was broken up, and we have all had to shift into different houses, and this makes life all the more difficult because how do I handle my one-year-old child, and how do I handle going to work, coming back home and taking care of the house also. I don’t think I hated myself for it, but the emotional hurt that I was piling up no matter how stupid or insignificant anybody would think of it, was making life absolutely miserable.
One of the mistakes that I committed early on in therapy, was trying to hurry up the entire process, and being watched by the gentle professor in a very amused manner. Today I realise that, I was wrong and that, thanks to his patience, my husband was able to open up with him on the third sitting, and come out with what was really hurting him, and when I asked him what was the issue, that was making our life hell, he was able to come out with a direct answer, which surprised me completely. When I think about it, and the devastating times we have had in our marriage, and the manner in which we have shouted at each other for the last three years, I only wish someone could have guided me, to seek professional help because I don’t think I could have achieved this without the wisdom and caring that was provided to me by Prof Singh.
This is very important to mention for me, because I went much more than my husband did, and I still do come on a regular basis, that I felt extremely safe with Prof Singh, and this is extremely important for me because, emotional safety, and the feeling that you are in hands that care for you is extremely important. Honestly speaking, more than a compassionate therapist, what I was looking for was an extremely sensible as well as a educated and well read professional, and this is what I found when I came to him. Everybody is a great listener, and everybody tries to be creative as well as come up with new ideas, but to be able to scientifically assess the issue and address it is something that I have found finally. It has taken us exactly 4 months to resolve all the issues that were outstanding in the relationship, and this is something absolutely incredible, and something I can never forget, and for which we shall always be there if we can do something for Prof Singh.

Mrs Choudhary (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
There are people who touch our lives at certain points in our life’s journey and we are forever changed and forever grateful for having met them and for the growth they have helped us to achieve.
My Doctor is one such person in my life. A close friend in India, whose son had been very effectively remediated for his dyslexia, introduced me to Dr. Singh during a time of deep personal crisis and turmoil when we knew no one here. I knew I wanted to chart a new path in my life’s journey, but I did not know how to do that. I did not have the emotional energy left, nor did I understand my patterns and the process of how to change my responses to my circumstances. Dr. Singh, to give him his due credit, helped me to develop a vast resource to deal with the joys and sorrows, the relationships as well as the expectations that I was facing in my life.
In the last three years, that I have visited and known him, I have come to value and appreciate his insight, empathy and true dedication to the mental health profession. He, never fails to surprise me, and it is an experience to sit with him, and here it from him how it is, and sometimes even before you are ready.
With my doctor’s support, I have learnt how to identify my target areas, which pulled me down and help me come back up where my personal growth is concerned. As my life coach and therapist, my doctor is a part of my journey, and supports me in my quest for a sound and healthy mind. Somehow he has managed to find the right mix for creating an emotionally successful balance in life, helping me understand my blessings and teaching me how to be open to new beginnings.
When my baby died, my husband and I talked that a part of us had died along with her. However I have to thank you sir that after going through so much of personal pain, your guidance has helped me see that I have the power to believe that there are a few things which are not in our control, and that I have the choice to select whether I am healthy or in pain, and that my thoughts and ideas have a value along with the fact that it is my choice, how I look back in pain for the trauma that I have suffered.
Dr. your therapy has been invaluable because you have guided us in volumes, and we never realized it during the process because it was so subtle and it gently paced process, that sometimes we did not even realise how the time went by, and how a new beginning reinforced our belief, when we were blessed with a baby girl this March.
My confidence has come back, and one of the most important values that I have taken back from you is that regardless of feeling sorry, or sometimes feeling in need of sympathy the crucial issue is that I need to deal with the that God has dealt me with.
Both Andreas and I, are convinced that your sessions have definitely helped us to live a better life, as well as a full life, and create a family, all over again, when we would have just given into depression, and probably gone our different ways. Thank you for changing our lives, and even for a miser like me, I feel that coming back to India to meet you, and visit the place where we left her, is a constant reminder of the fact that we probably have to remain in touch with you, given the therapeutic relationship that has been built between us. We now accept that we have to be our own judge, without automatically punishing ourselves and that it is more constructive to express our feelings than to allow them to build up inside of us. Both of us also believe that, we have to let go off of guilt, which is something you taught us and also the regret along with the old hurts, that keep on pinching us and change the way we behave, so that we can avoid anything that the risks touching the hurt all over again. We have decided to name our daughter Amrit, in the hope that she will grow up as pure as the word signifies. We will return to Germany by Friday, but I am very happy to meet and see that you are managing to touch the lives of others in a positive manner, thank you once again for pulling us out of the negativity that surrounded us after the first incident.
Elke

Mr R Aggarwal (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
The very thought of participating in marriage counselling, lead to more fights in our house than did the original issue of why we should go for marriage counselling. I think it was as if my husband was almost as frightened of the counselling itself as allowing our marriage to fail. Thankfully when we went to Dr Singh, he was well aware of these common misgivings, and he did his best to alleviate my husband’s fears, as well as my own fears, because we were actually reaching out for help, and he realised that the, key issue was that we needed to focus on the fundamental elements of strengthening our marriage.
Our problem had started almost about five years ago, because my husband was in a travelling job, as was I. Maybe we were both wrong because we could not devote enough time to each other, but eventually it emerged that he wanted to take a separation, because he felt that he was extremely, attached to someone who was working along with him.
When we came to Dr Singh’s clinic, and he explained the situation, his first opening sentence was that "how could you be so hurt?. That was not my intention, and that I wish you knew me and knew my heart, because I feel so misunderstood when I am around you". It is good to go in to counselling knowing that you are looking for an objective as well as a impartial view of how things are, but to be told by your husband that how could you be so hurt was a bit too much for me. Dr Singh actually held my hands, as I turned towards my husband, because he got scared that I may get physical.
The first thing he said was, that you are two different people, with different histories cultures and personalities, and please don’t expect your interactions to go as intended, because there will always be miscommunication with an unintended negative impact, which is going to hurt you. Somehow I managed to calm down, based on the reassurance and the coming effect his way of talking had on me, but I wanted to tell my husband that, intensions do not always have the intended impact. Sometimes intentions can have a greater impact, and sometimes intentions can have a lesser impact, but what you speak, and that also specially when we have come to resolve our conflicts, has to have some logic and sense. I would like to appreciate Dr Singh that, he did advise my husband that, there is a difference between an intention and the intended impact of what we are saying because of the filters, or the manner in which we understand something, That is being said and the way it is being said. It took a lot for my husband to understand that an unintentional tone, or wording can change the message, because of the manner in which it has been said, and the manner in which it has been understood.
When Dr Singh asked my husband, if he was already into a relationship, or that he wanted to move on from the current relationship, the answer was that he was tired and that he wanted to move on from the current relationship but had not initiated the new relationship. It is very personal to go into the details of the exact nature of the therapy that we went through, but I would like to say one thing and that is that I appreciate the fact that Dr Singh did not point out the specific flaws that either of us might be having, because as he said that it would only serve to build anger and resentment. When I look back I realise that, I actually wanted to know the flaws, that had brought us to this stage, but now six months after we met him, we both realised that it was one of the most sensible piece of advise because it helped us to work towards addressing our issues in a healthy manner.
I want to thank Dr Singh because, he was able to stop an issue from escalating into something much more serious which would have effected both of us as well as our two daughters who were now close to 13 years of age, and that it helped me to understand how my personality was impacting our relationship, and for my husband he learnt the methods of working through the inevitable as well as the irreconsiable differences of opinion, that he felt existed between the two of us. When I look back I realise that, it was not the differences of opinion that had led to the situation, but the fact that we were not ready to forgive each other in order to work through negative situations and actions that had led to this situation. I also would like to thank Dr Singh because, he emphasised positivity, and the unique as well as the exclusive techniques he used relating to rational and behaviour therapy has allowed us the power to develop and maintain a healthy relationship with each other now for the past six months, and I do not think that we will ever be in the same situation again, where my husband says that “ how could you be so hurt”.
It may sound a little bit silly but, what my husband was trying to tell me was, that he is yet not into a relationship, but would like to look for separation as a option to get into a relationship, and honestly I don’t think that it is a joke for anyone to say this to his wife. If only he had not believed in the fact that, I would not take feedback negatively, or that I twould no offer resistance, to any form of suggestion to improve our life together, we would not have gone through the turmoil of the last five years. Today we are much more healthier than we were, we are much better friends than just husband and wife, and we have actually sat with Dr Singh and, understood how to talk to each other as well as understand what we are trying to communicate, because this is the main thing that had vanished over the last seven or eight years of our married life. So our gratitude goes out to Dr Singh as a calm, balanced, as well as a very helpful gentleman.

Ashutosh sharma (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
We are from the city of Benaras. My husband and I had been married for three years when we decided to have our first child. Little did I know that I would find out that I’m pregnant exactly 5 days after my husband died. Everybody talks about having faith in God, and that whatever does is good and for the betterment of our lives. However how do you answer the question of losing your husband, and finding out that you are pregnant. It was all the more difficult because, nobody in a joint family understands the sense of loss that a wife can feel. My mother-in-law was grieving for her own son, my father-in-law withdrew and started to keep quiet, my brother-in-law and his wife went about their life, and in fact became even more cautious, in their dealings with me. If I say that our match was a match made in heaven, I would not be wrong because it is very difficult to find a life partner specially in an arranged marriage who can be so caring and loving.
When I thought about the baby, after she would was born, I just could not stop crying because I did not know what future would I give to her without her father, and I was mentally not prepared to accept any other man in my life even for myself or my child. My husband and I have always dreamt of raising our children to have good character traits, and of seen them growing up going to college and achieving something in their lives. Just before my husband died, we were in the process of buying a new apartment in Noida, he wanted it, designed so that we would be able to welcome our child and this is how much he thought about our children. I really remember the day when everything happened, is going away to office, and when leaving telling me that she felt as if he has a muscle spasm and that we must go to a doctor in the evening. However at around 2 o’clock, I received a call from the office to say that they had taken him to the BHU associated hospital and that he was fully conscious and that no one knew what was wrong. I was taken to the hospital by my in-laws, and when I reached there, it was shocking to see the number of people who were just, lying down in the corridors, in the intense heat, sweating and sick. What I hate most now about living there is the fact that, it took the ambulance on most one hour to get to the hospital, because of the traffic whereas it could have taken just five minutes, if only we had a better civic management system.The doctors also tried to revive him, but they gave up after three attempts, and then they asked me to come and have a look at him. his face was uncovered and you looked like he was fast asleep, but I knew that he was gone forever and that very minute, and everything around me just collapsed. When I woke up I was also in a hospital bed, and the gynaecologist told my mother in law that it is better I be allowed to rest in the hospital, and given the state of my pregnancy. It is then that after five days that I realise that I am pregnant. It was a huge shock for me, because I did not know what I would do. Already it was so distressing to hear the shrieks and cries of his mother which were completely heartbreaking.
As We had already booked our flats in Noida, and my nephew was under the care of Dr Singh, I decided to visit him because the pregnancy did not leave me with a lot of options, and visiting him was a blessing in disguise because the first thing that I understood was that I have to take a hold of myself and carry on. That I could not waver and that I have to manage to take care of myself and my child who has to come into this world. I kept asking the doctor that ‘ how will I go through the pregnancy without my husband, and how will I find the physical and emotional energy to take care of the child’. Slowly, but steadily speaking to Dr Singh I realise that, there are moments of despair, but when you have no option you have to build up the strength to just carry on. I learned from Dr Singh then there are and they will be moments of despair and of heart breaking days, as well as of longing month and this too shall pass, and that if I did not collapse in the initial two years, I would be able to make it through. Dr Singh helped me through each and every month of my pregnancy, and he actually went out of the way to come when I delivered my child, and he taught me to find strength in loving my incredible child, who needed me and would eventually return my love.There was no help from the community, and I realise that I am completely on my own, except for the support of my mother and father, and eventually I did have to move back into the house. However I give credit to Dr Singh, that he made sure that my family worked together, and rather than let me be broken and crying all the time, that they encourage me over and over again, and give me the strength to keep doing what I have to do.The greatest problem came from the fact that, whenever anybody who did not know us asked me what does your husband do, my heart would sink, because I would think that what you have to say to someone, who does not understand about the difficult circumstances that I am having to deal with. Dr Singh advised me that, don’t think about the whole road ahead of you and take one step at a time, all the time focusing only on what you have to do in this moment and to look at small victories until I have accumulated enough to say that I have the strength to look at life, and feel confident that I did not collapse. It was a very liberating, as well as a very helpful one year that I have had with my therapist, and my faith in God has been strengthened by my tragedy, and more than that my faith in human beings, like Dr Singh has been further strengthened, with the selflessness with which he helped me, when I just felt like dying. It is that times like this, when you do not understand that everything looks different, that you need someone to tell you, and show you how strong you are, and this is exactly what he did, and this is what saved me from completely finishing. I live now live now, for the present, and for my daughter, and for her future, with self-respect and dignity, and I have learned this from my mentor, and this is what I have to say to him, you have been the Dr Singh for me and my family, and at some point of time, I pray that God gives you all that you want. You are going to forever be, my father when my father is not there, you are always going to be my doctor before I take every decision in life, and I wish there was more I could do for you.

Nupur Goswami (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
Sadness and Depression after I lost my child.

When I lost my second and third child to miscarriages, the depression hit me like a hammer. The diagnosis was postpartum OCD, I had no idea where to start, how to understand it, how to talk about it, how to find a therapist – nothing in my life had prepared me for what was happening to me. I have never been in a deeper or darker place and had no hope of ever getting out of it specially in the kind of family I was married into.
There was so much pain and I felt so detached from who I really was. No one believed me when I said I was sad. Everyone said it is normal to be sad after the loss of a baby. The answer is it is not normal.
As I never struggled with depression before in my life, so it took me a while to understand out what was happening to me. All I knew was that I was afraid for my life and I didn’t know how to get help. I called Prof. Singh and ate his head on the phone for 15 minutes until he bluntly said, you have postpartum depression even before I could meet him. "Take charge or wobble in misery” were his words.
My gynaecologist had already put me on 200Mg of serlift and I had been receiving treatment for almost 6 months and still did not feel 10% like myself yet, I felt like I’m not even getting there.
I had stopped taking a bath, laid on the bed and kept debating whether to go or not to meet Prof Singh. Eventually I did and it was a great relief. When I met him I had minimal support at home and had reached the point where I figured I was at a dead end. But that first meeting with Prof Singh where he helped me see I just needed to turn the corner and take the next step, made such a difference, that I went home somewhat more balanced. My husbands joint family was so uncomfortable talking about it at all that I tended not to bring it up so that I did not have to deal with the shame that was not mine to feel.
I cannot express the relief to know, in fact the immediate relief I felt knowing that I was not the first mother to have horrible crying sessions and collecting baby clothes that I could not bear to throw away. The meetings with Prof Singh along with my husband made my husband understand how I felt and believe me sir you saved me the months of agony I would have gone through were it not that I had found you here. Because of you I’m no longer afraid to tell my husband, my family and my gynaecologist about my recurring thoughts about as if a part of me is gone from inside me and that I feel so empty inside.
Now about 5 months from starting to feel good (after therapy) I still almost bi monthly visit him with my husband and Prof Singh sir , I think it is a great thing that you are doing.It is wonderful and you are making a difference and any day I will stand for you and say I’m living proof that you were the one person who understood. You gave me hope that I would make it through, and most importantly you made everyone in my family understand that I need to be given space to rest and recover. I did not need people coming into my bedroom and saying all will be okay. It can’t be okay, this is the hypocrisy of our lives.
Thank you sir for doing what you do and for having a sense of humour where you can make a heavy burden seem light and keeping me informed and for bringing up the issues and sharing things I’m sure I would not have been able to share with anyone else. I will be sharing my experience with every single mother I know. It should be mandatory for mothers to meet you I think. It can help so much. Sincerely Nupur Goswami

Anshika Singh (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
Marriage Abuse

It is truly a pleasure to find a therapist who not only takes great interest in his clients, but also creates a comforting environment for you to be able to speak your heart out, without worrying that will anybody ever come to know. This is one thing that I really liked about Prof Singh, and that was his written commitment that he gave to me that he would not be what would never ever share anything about me to anybody else. Initially I was very hesitant to go to anybody for any form of help because, my partner has been emotionally and at times even physically abusive. It started with pushing and shoving, and taking my keys when I wanted to go out as if he felt very insecure and jealous of people he thought were a threat.
There would be evenings when he would be drinking, and start accusing me of being too modern, and I can’t even say what he called me but it would go on until he would fall asleep and the next date was always the same, he was sorry and didn’t know why he said it and did the things he did. I believed him at first, but after three years time I knew it was a mistake and I had to leave this marriage.It was actually my own father who said that, why don’t I take things in my hand and either I should leave the marriage or I should make sure that he changes, because this is not the way we could continue living. I found Prof Singh on the Internet, and I came to him because he was in another city, and we did not want to go to any doctor where we live. Actually it’s a mistake to think that we should try to hide and make ourselves okay, but I think this thinking of mine actually brought me to the correct person, who eventually helped me become strong and stand on my own feet.I came for a different reason, to hide from all the people who may have known me, but God brought me to the person who actually helped me regain my dignity and my respect which I had lost over a period of time.The most important thing I learnt from Prof Singh was that I have to believe in myself and tell myself that I deserve better, and that it is hard, but you can proceed with your life, and that I don’t have to live like this, if I feel so strongly about the physical and emotional insult that I have been facing for so long.The second time I came I brought my partner along with me, and over the next few sessions, even Prof Singh realised that it was going to be very difficult and impossible to change.I Wanted a change in my partner, and I wanted to keep the relationship, because I was very scared of what society would say to my parents, and to me once I was labelled as a divorcee.
The experience of Prof Singh is that there was an immediate sense that what he is doing is very important to him, and I now feel I had waited a little too long to seek help for what would have eventually turned into a chronic situation, and when I think of how I would have been at the age of 50 suffering the emotional abuse I still cannot stop shivering.What I could not have achieved alone, I was able to achieve with the gradual healing process that I went through, and rather than taking an immediate decision to seek a divorce, or put a case on my husband, I followed the guidance of Prof Singh, and I put some distance between my husband and myself, and I continued to work, and look a transfer to Delhi, from Chandigarh.My company helped me a lot, because when they asked me the reason why I wanted to come to the head office, Prof Singh was very kind enough to take the entire responsibility on himself, and speak to my superiors, and put across my situation in such a manner that, I did not lose my reputation as well as nobody came to know the real reason for the posting.
Time can be a great healer, as he advised me, and sometimes creating a distance between the person who is turning you into a complete emotional wreck, can be better than taking an immediate decision, which is not reversible. This is exactly what I did, under his guidance, and today after two years, I am much more happier and relaxed person than I was in the first three years of my marriage.My partner has also sobered as he realised eventually that, it is easy to find a punching bag at home, but nobody will take any form of aggression or nonsense outside, and how materialistic the world can be. We have been corresponding with each other for eight months now, and we met on the 14th of this month for the first time, and I could not believe my eyes, when I saw him talking so humbly, and then asking for my forgiveness. We came to see Prof Singh yesterday, and I think he was as surprised because my husband took out a piece of paper on which she had written his apology, and how he will make up for all the rough time that he had given me. I I’m writing this because I also much to Prof Singh, who was always there emotionally, never wavering in a support, always guiding me, and today I am crying as I write this, because everybody from my husband’s family came to our house, and formally apologised for everything that he had done, and requested me to reconsider my decision.I don’t know what I am going to decide, but I know one thing for sure, I have my dignity back, I have my respect back, and I know that even I am worth a lot, and not a ‘ bloody wxxxe’ as he used to call me.I have to thank the man, who was my mentor, my guide, a surrogate father, and a therapist, who supported me without questioning.He did tell me that if I was wrong he would have said so, but in this case as he said, we should not forget that, somebody’s wife, is also somebody’s daughter, and how would my husband have felt, this was done to a daughter if we had one. Thank you very much sir, because I know where to go now, when everything seems like it is falling down around me and thank you very much for not allowing me to take the medicines, and for helping me come through with emotional strength.

Dr Urvashi (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
I Didn’t know what to expect with my first appointment with Dr. Singh. Being married for just 12 months, and suddenly seeing a change in the behaviour of your husband and your in-laws is one of the most difficult things that any girl can expect, specially after it is a love marriage. Being married was itself such a big challenge, and then the challenge that your husband has been diagnosed with mood swings and there are days when everything is fine and then there are days when he is screaming at me and I’m screaming back at him eventually, lead to a situation where I was scared and exhausted of even coming out of my room because it was a joint family, and I was the smaller of the bhau’s. I try to find a therapist when the physical fights between us reached such an extent that we were able to even predict who is going to use which method to hurt the other person.
We found Dr. Singh using an extensive online search and were attracted to his obvious deep knowledge of the human mind, and it was not a random decision to come to Dr Singh, but a conscious decision, along with a feeling in the heart that he may be the one who can find a solution to our unnecessary problems, which really should not be there if there was no third party interference.
I have to say that I will never forget how when we met for the first time he made me feel supported unconditionally and the faith that I felt when I met him and I realised that the trust that has been broken in our marriage can still be brought back. I also realise after meeting him that what I was going through wasn’t going to be the end of me, and it was going to be actually the beginning of understanding of what relationships and expectations are all about. At one time when I felt like my world was about to end Dr Singh used an analogy of unpacking and packing a suitcase for the next stage of my life, to examine every piece of clothing carefully, and decide if each one was helping or hurting me, and to only take with me those items which were the best, and which made me feel wonderful, and not necessarily the most expensive. Items that give me peace and joy, and not those which were meant for the world to see. I realise that this is exactly what I needed and he also helped me with the relationship troubles, I was having with my mother-in-law, who somehow could not seem to let go of her son, and wanted to be a part of his life even after he was married and was now 28 years old.
The manner in which Dr Singh approached our case, impressed me on multiple levels, and I have to say that he had an uncanny sense for what I was pondering but hadn’t yet said aloud, really listened effectively to what I was seeking, brought forward beautiful design ideas for my consideration of how life should be built around the quality and balance along with a lot of trust thrown in, and did it all in a timely manner and with excellent communication skills. The ‘ sixth sense’ that we talk about, was present and evident, very strongly in his room, and I can perfectly vouch for the fact that,if he touches your hand,he can read exactly what you are thinking. It can be a little scary in the beginning when you realise that the person sitting across you, is able to understand each and everything that you are thinking, but when you get into the flow and begin to relax yourself when you begin to surrender and you realise that you are not being judged, the whole process takes on a different meaning altogether.
I remember knowing my husband all the way from school when the were in class IX, and I don’t think that I was ever that much attracted to him or considered him to be the person that I would eventually marry. But when we met in a class reunion that was organised by Modern School BKR, it is at that time that he approached me and said that he always liked me very much and that it was okay he would like to invite me out. Of course eventually we did marry each other, but somehow meeting somebody going out with the person,’s having fun, is so different from the whole process of getting married, that the initial happiness, somehow had gone out of our marriage, and it had been replaced with, a sense of, a kind of a feeling of what have I done?
Is this what my mother and father have raised me for, is this the reason why I myself am a doctor, and yet I am, not able to resolve my own problems, such petty problems as, why cannot she make a cup of tea for us, or something so, childish as that why does she not help out in the kitchen. Nobody saw that, I also was a human being, and that I also had feelings, and that even I was getting very tired after coming back from the hospital. I don’t think at one point of time, even my husband understood what was happening, and this is something that Dr Singh immediately understood. When you go through medical school we have seen many cases, where people are gifted, but I can say with full conviction that, the gift that Dr Singh has of, making you feel at ease, and trying to resolve your problems as quickly as possible, in a very logical and scientific manner, are yet to be seen. I am simply amazed by his ability to read your mind and your questions, so subconsciously while going through the entire process, where he may just, touch your finger tip accidentally, and everything becomes so very clear.
I want to thank him, very few people thank their doctors, because I know it as I am also a doctor, and I want to take this opportunity to share my feelings, and my gratitude that I feel to him, because not only did he manage to show what was happening in the house to my husband, but somehow he even managed to get my in-laws to come to him, which was next to impossible, because they are so proud people, and very gently sharing with them what exactly was happening, and that how either our house could turn out to be a perfect blissful house, or it could turn out to be absolute misery. I don’t think we are yet hundred percent there yet, but we are definitely around 75% better and I think that is a huge achievement in a matter of two months and just three sittings. I want to thank you sir, as a junior as well as a client, because you understood the emotional pain that was being faced by me, and you also understood the emotional pain that was being thrown at my husband, and you were absolutely impartial in your sessions with us, and more than providing a solution, you are able to help us see, what was happening and what, would happen in the future if we continued in the same direction. I would always be happy to ask those of my patients who are distressed to come to you, and I am relieved that we found you and keep you as our life coach and therapist.
Dr. Urvashi

Carol Sencer (Verified)

In-clinic
5 years ago
I recommend the doctor
The reason for the email and this small appreciation note Dr Singh is to thank you. You helped get me by getting on the track of healing. I believe that if it weren't for our interactions I would not have gotten on track. I am, and my family in the US is eternally grateful for the wisdom and resources you shared with me.
As an American who was posted to an IT company as a Trainer for a few Months, I was living in Noida in a hotel. The emptiness of being here in India hit me very hard in 2 weeks time. I had always imagined India to be a spiritual country and was looking forward to learning from this country. However it was a shocker to see that it was just like any other metropolitan city and not clean specially when rained. In the US we see our therapist regularly once in 15 days to sit and sort out our worries and thoughts. Its not like that in India. The girls of my age were still talking to their moms and working on outdated emotional answers. Fortes being the closest hospital, I was directed there when my director found me gasping for breath. However I am sad to say that how can 5 minutes and a prescription cure emptiness and loneliness. Did the doctor even understand what I was going through? When I went to the therapist there, the person was more interested in where I live in the Midwest and life there than in me and I gave up.
As I was staying in the hotel next to a mall, where we went for dinner, I came across this clinic and decided to visit it. Meeting Dr Singh was like walking into my therapist’s clinic back home. The three hours I spent with him are priceless and he gave me the gift of hope by first understanding me and then guiding me appropriately. Those crucial beginning baby steps he took to understand why I was
‘flipping’ out and running up extreme stress and panic and anxiety helped me towards recovery. Probably having a German bloodline helped but Dr Singh worked through everything so systematically and precisely, that I wish I had met him before. I actually have taken a stack of his cards to pass around to my colleagues and friends if they come to India, and need professional help. He is as good if not a few shades better than our own therapist. There is no pretence, no beating around the bush and a simple straightforward approach with such kindness that it overwhelms.
As I leave India today, I leave with a better feeling inside me and have had a wonderful opportunity to meet a therapist who took me off a med called zapis and healed me with rational analysis of what was going on, my perceptions, my expectations and what was driving me off the edge into the deep blackness of emptiness, sadness and loneliness. I never did find the spiritual side of what India had to offer, but when trouble came, It helped to find the right person right there next to my building where I was staying. Carol Sencer

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